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The Dilemma of a Marriage and Divorce


 

"Getting up, He *went from there to the region of Judea and beyond the Jordan; crowds *gathered around Him again, and, according to His custom, He once more began to teach them.

Some Pharisees came up to Jesus, testing Him, and began to question Him whether it was lawful for a man to divorce a wife. And He answered and said to them, "What did Moses command you?" They said, "Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away." But Jesus said to them, "Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment. But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, and the two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate."

In the house the disciples began questioning Him about this again. And He *said to them, "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her; and if she herself divorces her husband and marries another man, she is committing adultery."

Good Morning my beloved,
 
We welcome you to worship in the name of God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. It is a privilege to come together with you, a privilege that must never to be taken for granted. As we come to the Word of the God, continuing working our way through the Gospel of Mark, we’re going to embark on a new chapter, Mark 10:1-12. As we pointed out previously, Mark is the shortest Gospel because he highlights only certain miracles, parables and teachings of our Lord.

Let me begin by saying, I’m committed to declaring what the Bible teaches, without compromise, in spite of the fact it may be counter-cultural and even controversial. We’re called to be like Jesus Who was always full of grace and truth, though not always politically correct. As I have mentioned many times, when you preach through the Bible expositorily, verse by verse, you're not afforded the luxury of avoiding difficult or controversial topics. I believe every word of God is true and pure, therefore, every verse deserves to be examined and rightly understood. We cannot be indifferent to what God says in His Word, even when it's uncomfortable to hear. That said, my aim is to do it truthfully, in a spirit of grace, trusting God will do what He said He will do and penetrate hardened hearts. While any offense is unintentional, it's often necessary to produce the fruit of repentance.

In the latter part of the 1800s, the famous British preacher and theologian Charles Hadden Spurgeon used the phrase, "What would Jesus do?," in one of his sermons to inspire people to a higher moral standard of living. Nearly 100 years later, in the early 1900s a Christian youth group in Michigan started a movement using the acronym "WWJD" and the idea took off. I believe it doesn’t really matter if we ask the question, "What would Jesus Do," it's how we answer the question that matters. However, more often than not, we will be confronted with a challenge we simply cannot meet. I am confident that you and I do not have the authority to forgive a person’s sins, heal sickness and disease or raise people from the dead. Instead, we must load our prayers with such requests. Rather than concerning ourselves with what we think Jesus would do in a given situation, I believe a far better approach is to start remembering that since Christ lives in each and every believer, we must become more Christ-like. Isn't that God's desire for us, to be conformed to the likeness of His Son?

We have all no doubt heard the words "What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate" in countless marriage ceremonies. I believe in general, most, if not all couples, probably don't enter into marriage expecting to one day break up and divorce. Unfortunately, when insurmountable challenges arise, people begin to say, enough is enough, I can't go on like this. Since most people in the world today, have a godless view of marriage and divorce, a myriad of misunderstandings exist. Much like the convoluted one  that Jesus addresses with the Pharisees today.

While Jesus never said anything explicitly about same-sex marriage, it is unfathomable to think that His teachings on biblical marriage have no relevance on the issue, or our moral assessment on the normative expression of human sexuality. What we believe and understand about Jesus' teaching marriage and divorce must be drawn on what He does say about marriage and divorce, rather than what He does not. It would be an incredible mistake to conclude that Jesus' words affirming the covenanted union of marriage as one man and one woman as having no bearing on the subjects of same-sex marriage or homosexuality, in general, considering He did speak explicitly about sexual immorality and sexual relationships in general, outside heterosexual marriage. There is absolutely no place in Scripture, where fornication, adultery or any kind of physical relationship outside of biblical marriage is condoned, and Jesus makes this very clear when He’s talking about divorce. Divorce has affected nearly all of us in some way, many of us have friends and family who are divorced, some of us come from divorced parents, and some of us are divorced ourselves. Tragically, after a divorce, probably 50% of the children involved will never see their fathers again, and many children carry the scars that arise from that. So, I do not feel that we can simply gloss over it and move on.

If you look at the culture we live in today, it is a sex-saturated society gone mad because of the lack of ability to exercise self-restraint. It has become not only epidemic, but has reached pandemic proportions. It's important to understand that there are times where you’re going to be tempted to sin. However, I do not believe anybody who names the name of Christ should allow themselves to be put in a position that Satan would be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-restraint. When a society violates God's clear commands, it is absolutely certain that we are going to experience the painful consequences of that willful disobedience. I believe that is exactly what we are witnessing in our culture today. I have often heard, that Scripture, written thousands of years ago, really does not apply to the culture today because our society has changed and has all but abandoned the idea of a traditional family. I want to be very clear, God is no more tolerant, no more accepting of sin today than He was when He created the universe. 

In Genesis 1:27-28, "God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. God blessed them; and God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth." While this is not intended to be hate speech in any way, I cannot force God’s Word to affirm sexual immorality, in any form, regardless of what society claims, two human beings, of the same gender cannot "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth." As Christians, we need to recognize that these issues are not just something that plagues unbelievers, sadly, it affects just as many within the church, who proclaim to "follow Jesus." I must say, I have to question just how closely they think they're following Him by living an openly sinful life. God clearly calls us to have the character and likeness of Christ, that the unbelieving world can see, therefore, we must be willing to live a Christ-centered life that is acceptable to God. 

Let us pray,

Heavenly Father,

Father, we thank You for Your Word and for the clarity with which it speaks to this important issue. Lord, we have so many people in the church who are living alternative lifestyles, living in a sexual relationship with a person they are not married to, who are married and are committing adultery dishonoring the sanctity of marriage because many false teachers are affirming what You forbid, as if there is an exception clause. O' Father, I pray that the Holy Spirit, by the power of divine grace, would convict all of us who struggle with the fallenness of sin and lead us to repentance with the knowledge that You hate sin, all sin, every sin. Not just their sin, but my sin. Lord, pour out on Your Spirit on us that it would spill over onto the unbelieving people in our lives. Use us mightily to influence the wickedness, the corruption of the culture around us and bring shame on their habitually sinful lives. Be merciful to those who have worshiped their immoral behavior, even those among us here today and grant them the gift of repentance, that none should perish, for Your glory and for Christ's sake. 
In His name we ask and pray
Amen
 
Today's Message:  The Dilemma of a Marriage and Divorce

In 2 Corinthians 13:5, Paul writes, "Test yourselves to see if you are in the faith; examine yourselves! Or do you not recognize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you—unless indeed you fail the test?" 

We have a lot of people who profess to be Christians, that are deeply deceived about their true spiritual condition, because they regularly attend a church that affirms a lifestyle or union outside of biblical marriage. A large percentage of them identify as homosexual and transgender, living beyond the clear boundaries of Scripture. Any "church" that does not uphold biblical teaching, ceases to be a true church.

Jesus believed that marriage was between a man and a woman. Jesus believed in the sacred covenant of marriage. Jesus believed that any sexual relationship outside of biblical marriage is sin, if that's not what you believe you are deceiving yourselves, believing a prostituted version that has led you astray. I encourage you to repent and believe the Gospel with a desire to be obedient to Christ.

Open your Bibles with me to Mark chapter 10, verses 1 through 12. Mark 10:1-12. I invite you to follow along with me as I read to set the text in our minds. Let us open our hearts and minds and see how the Lord might use us to impact the lives of others.

"Getting up, He *went from there to the region of Judea and beyond the Jordan; crowds *gathered around Him again, and, according to His custom, He once more began to teach them.

Some Pharisees came up to Jesus, testing Him, and began to question Him whether it was lawful for a man to divorce a wife. And He answered and said to them, "What did Moses command you?" They said, "Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away." But Jesus said to them, "Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment. But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, and the two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate."

In the house the disciples began questioning Him about this again. And He *said to them, "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her; and if she herself divorces her husband and marries another man, she is committing adultery."

Let's look at verse 1, "Getting up, He *went from there to the region of Judea and beyond the Jordan; crowds *gathered around Him again, and, according to His custom, He once more began to teach them." 

Jesus departed from Galilee, having concluded His ministry there because they rejected Him and tried to kill Him and now He heads south to Judah, on His way to Jerusalem. He goes east, down the eastern back side of the Jordan River, goes into the area that is known as Perea, the that is called by the Jews "beyond the Jordan," a territory under the control of Herod Antipas, where many Jews that had taken up residency. This is important because Herod had divorced his wife and married the divorced wife of his own brother and committed incest with her.

By the way, Mark makes no mention of His Judean ministry at all, which lasted quite a number of months, He has also concluded. So we’re nearly at the end of His earthly ministry.

Verse 2, "Some Pharisees came up to Jesus, testing Him, and began to question Him whether it was lawful for a man to divorce a wife." Matthew tells us they asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason at all?" While this may sound like an innocent enough question, it's important that you understand the purpose behind their question. Since divorce was a volatile issue among the Jews, being popular among the people, they wanted Jesus to say that divorce was wrong and condemn everybody that was divorced to alienate Him from the people and the leaders, who held popular view that you can divorce your wife for literally any reason. Which by the way, was the view that the Pharisees taught. So this was a loaded question, remember Herod had John the Baptist beheaded because he had confronted his divorce and adulterous marriage. They were hoping that Herod would do the same to Jesus.

God’s Word says whoever divorces his wife except for sexual immorality and marries another woman commits adultery. Adultery is the one exception that breaks the marriage covenant. We already know that God does not acknowledge any marriage that falls outside His design. 

Verse 3, "And He answered and said to them, "What did Moses command you?" I love the way that Jesus evades answering their question on their terms, by asking a question of His own. In fact, He doesn’t even  address the issue of divorce initially; He talks about marriage. Unintimidated, He cut through the traditions of the rabbi's with that one statement and sarcastically asks "What did Moses command you?" He knew they spent all their time reading and studying God's Word. The problem is, the Old Testament standard had been long replaced by the prevailing rabbinic view of Rabbi Hillel, which made divorce easy. Much like it is in America country today, where you can get divorced for literally any reason. The Pharisees upheld the view that you could divorce your wife for any reason that she becomes displeasing. "Displeasing" can be anything you want it to be. Like making a negative comment about your mother or burning your food. So they would love for the crowd to hear Jesus say, "You’re all a bunch of adulterers!," because they knew He took a very firm stand on divorce. 

It's the same today, I've had people attempt to bait the conversation to show that I'm intolerant of certain issues, then they launch a malicious all out character assassination based on their distorted opinions rather than facts. By it's very nature, God's Word is divisive. It is not a particularly enjoyable for me to have to discuss controversial topics, but I make no apology for my firm stance on the biblical Truths, because I know the enemy’s goal is to lead people astray and drag them into Hell. God promises to protect His own in every battle. Satan can never touch the most precious thing I've got, my salvation. I'm very aware of Satan and his evil forces relentless tempts to lead me into sin, so he can destroy my witness for Christ. 

The Pharisees knew what to ask, they had heard what He said in His Sermon on Mount, in Matthew 5:31-32, "It was said, ‘Whoever sends his wife away, let him give her a certificate of divorce’; but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery."

Obviously, they did not get the answer they wanted. You've got to to give them credit though, no matter how many times He defeated their pathetic efforts to trap Him, they continued to make an effort to discredit Him. I imagine they thought that if they could keep slinging enough mud at Him, something would stick, eventually. 

Verse 4, "They said, "Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away."  Then in verse 5, "But Jesus said to them, "Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment." Moses was essentially trying to manage the chaos of the people with human reasoning. Jesus doesn't do that, He always turns to the Scriptures, because marriage is a holy covenant before God. Notice, that Jesus doesn’t say that the offended spouse is required to seek a divorce against the offending spouse. Grace, forgiveness, and redemption are still an option.

Matthew adds He said "Have you not read?" I love that, He's going straight to God's Word in verses 6-9, to remind them what God says. "But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, and the two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate."  Listen, Genesis 1:27 is emphatically clear, God made them male and female for the purpose of marriage. It's important to note, there is no provision for divorce in God's design for marriage. There's no provision for polygamy, same-sex marriage or any other alternatives. God's design is no different today. So if you want to know what Jesus would do, He'd point people back to God's view of marriage and point out if man has bent the rules, it's because of your hardness of heart. In other words, any variation in God's design is always a result of someone’s out of control sin. And God hates sin. Pastors are not called to represent political or social views, that's not our business, I discourage becoming involved that. We're called to proclaim what the Bible plainly teaches, that marriage is a monogamous relationship, between one man, and one woman for life.

The language of Genesis 2:24, "they shall become one flesh," makes it clear marriage is an undissolvable union, you're permanently connected together, in other words, you're stuck together. When God instituted marriage, there were no other people for Adam and Eve to marry, that the pattern every marriage is to follow. Marriage is a picture of the unbreakable covenant between Christ and His church. How seriously does God take the covenant of marriage? What's the seventh commandment? "You shall not commit adultery." In Matthew 5:28, Jesus didn't make any provision for a corrupt culture when He said "But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Lust is prohibited because it leads to other illicit sexual behavior.

So, what does God say the penalty is for those who violate the marriage covenant? Leviticus 20:10, "If there is a man who commits adultery with another man’s wife, one who commits adultery with his friend’s wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death." Marriage conflicts exist because of Adam and Eve’s sin. Husbands and wives were designed to work together as a team but because of the curse, God said he will rule over you and she will desire to have her own way. That's what "Yet your desire will be for your husband" means. By the way, I believe God's Word makes it clear, abortion is to child birth what divorce and adultery are to marriage, both are attempting to destroy the work of God. God’s allowed a certificate of divorce for reasons of adultery, that the exception. But if divorce your spouse and marry somebody else, you commit adultery. The original intent idea is to make you think twice about divorce, not to encourage it. But they were so corrupt, they perverted the meaning because they’re looking for a loophole.

Let's go back to Mark 10, verse 10, "In the house the disciples began questioning Him about this again." Mark doesn’t record the entire conversation. In Matthew's parallel account, the disciples seemed to get the message, "If the relationship of the man with his wife is like this, it is better not to marry." Jesus said "Not all men can accept this statement, but only those to whom it has been given." Both marriage and singleness are a gift from God, that's why Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 7, "But I say to the unmarried and to widows that it is good for them if they remain even as I. But if they do not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband and that the husband should not divorce his wife." Single people can devote a lot more time to ministry than those who are married and have families. But if being single is going to lead you into sin, get married, that's the point. To be clear, the Bible is not saying, marriage is only for sex but one of the biblical reasons for marriage is sexual fulfillment. Serving God is the ultimate purpose of life whether married or single.

That brings us to verses 11-12, where Jesus gives the disciples some clarification. "And He *said to them, "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her; and if she herself divorces her husband and marries another man, she is committing adultery." Before we go forward, allow me to say, God does hate divorce, but He does not hate divorced people. Next, notice that Jesus elevates the status of the wife, giving her equal rights and responsibilities. Having said that, adultery doesn't have to lead to divorce, God’s heart is always for reconciliation and restoration of the marriage covenant. Don’t look for a way out; look for a way through.

God does not permit an illegitimately divorced person to remarry. It's important to recognize that the majority of divorced people do remarry and many of them end in another divorce. Among newly married adults in 2013, 29% had been married at least once before. And what we have is a plethora of broken marriages, divorced people living together, committing fornication, and children born out of wedlock, many without a father in the home. In fact, single parent families have become even more common than the traditional family. There are even increasing numbers of grandparent raising their grandchildren. All because people defected from God's plan. The bottomline is, it doesn't matter what a society ruled by Satan allows, what matters is what God says. Because in the end, that's who you'll answer to!

May it be so..

And now may the Lord bless you and keep you;

the Lord make His face shine upon you,

And be gracious to you;

The Lord lift up His countenance upon you,
And give you peace.

Now and forever, in Jesus' name
Amen

 
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